That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
