Your dad touched me again.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize