Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
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