I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
