just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
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