maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
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