Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Randomize
