Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
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