i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
a search helicopter?!
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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