I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
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