my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
