I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
