I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Randomize
