i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
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