If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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