Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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