So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Randomize
