have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize
