Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
You made out with two different species that night
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
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