well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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