Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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