what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Randomize
