I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Randomize
