I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Randomize
