Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
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