I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
Randomize
