remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
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