What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
Randomize
