There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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