i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
i think i have two assholes
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize