I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize