no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
Randomize