k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
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