I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
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