I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Randomize
