i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Someone signed my nipple.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
Randomize
