ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
