I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
Randomize
