dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
So apparently I’m into choking now
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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