I love black thongs
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
Randomize