It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
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