Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Randomize
