people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
