Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Randomize
