Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
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