I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
i just ordered a pitcher of margaritas for me and a friend but she called and canceled. oh well, looks like im getting trashed alone.
the waiter who hardly speaks english told me "i go get your medicine now"
this medicine is soooo good.
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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