butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
Randomize