Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
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