sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
Did you just see the Batmobile???
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Randomize
