The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
