What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
Randomize
